Tomorrow is my first EVER day of school as a teacher! I am SO nervous. From what I hear, however, this nervous feeling never really goes away. Regardless, I think I am more nervous than most. I just fear that I'm going to make several mistakes or forget what I should be doing or miss this, or mess that up...just so many fears! I am terrified of ruining the education of these 28 students!! All I've ever wanted to do was to work with children, inspire them, and enable them to be learners for life. Yet I am afraid that, being so new at this, I'm going to make more mistakes than the other 2nd grade teacher, or I'll stretch myself too far and not be the best that I can for my students, or I'll leave the struggling students behind, or I'll forget about the students that want and are able to learn beyond the standard. AAAHHH!! I just don't know!! I do not feel ready for tomorrow at all! Sure...I know what I'll be doing/teaching, I've met 22 of 28 students and most of their parents, and I absolutely love what I do. Will that be enough? Will everything I learned in school over a year ago come back in flying colors or will I struggle to remember? I just don't know!! I want the very best for these kids and I am stressed that I will not be able to give them the best. I hope that once I'm in front of the students again, that everything will be just as natural as it always has been. I hope my nerves don't hinder that. I have never experienced a first day of school in the teacher role and I am terrified, terrified being an understatement.
I know this has been an entirely too long paragraph, but all of these thoughts are rushing out just as I write them. No break. Writing them all down has helped calm the nerves a bit, though. A small fraction, anway. So hopefully I'm not writing tomorrow about how horrible my first day went. I am hoping that it will be a tired, yet joyful post. If I'm not tired, then I know I didn't do my job at all. Haha. So...here's hoping!!
To all you teachers...keep on learning!
~Miss Irving~